Surviving Single During February
By: Kelly Anderson, Ph.D.
It’s February which typically signals one thing for a lot of people: Valentine’s Day. Even though there are 27 more days in the month, many people look at February with dread because of the 14th.
If you’re struggling with currently being single or are in a place where you crave a romantic relationship, this month might be a little bit harder for you than others. While it can feel like Valentine's Day is exclusively reserved for those in romantic relationships, with a few mindset shifts and skills, this month presents a unique opportunity for singles to celebrate self-care, personal growth, and the joy of being independent.
Embrace Self-Love
Valentine's Day is the perfect occasion to turn your focus inward and practice self-love. Take the day to pamper yourself, whether it's with a spa day, a favorite meal, or a good book. Reflect on your achievements and appreciate the person you are and all that you've done. It may be helpful to remember, that a healthy relationship with yourself is the foundation for any successful partnership and therefore improving your relationship with yourself is an amazing way to be ready for a relationship when the time is right.
Celebrate Connections
Valentine's Day doesn't have to be exclusively about romantic love. Cherish the platonic relationships in your life—friends, family, and colleagues. Plan a get-together, share a meal, or engage in activities that bring you joy. Over the years, I’ve found that I get more excited about Galentines with my closest friends over the traditional celebration of Valentine’s Day. For those of us with kiddos (our own or the children of friends or family) you can start new traditions and add some silliness to your yearly celebration. Surrounding yourself with positive connections can make this day meaningful and fulfilling.
Set Personal Goals
Use Valentine's Day as an opportunity to set personal goals and intentions for the coming months. Focus on aspects of your life that bring you satisfaction and fulfillment. Whether it's a career goal, a fitness milestone, or a creative project, channel your energy into activities that contribute to your personal growth. While finding a romantic relationship may be a goal of yours, having created a life full of joy and meaning outside of a relationship can help you to feel empowered and better cope with loneliness.
Cultivate Gratitude
Shift your perspective by practicing gratitude. Take a moment to reflect on the positive aspects of your life—your achievements, experiences, and the people who have played a significant role. Gratitude has the power to enhance your overall well-being and create a positive mindset, even on Valentine's Day.
Mindful Reflection
Use this time for mindful reflection on your past relationships. Identify lessons learned, personal growth achieved, and areas for improvement. This introspection can pave the way for healthier future connections, should you choose to pursue them. It also allows you time to take a personal inventory to notice what you love about yourself and what you’d like to change in your life.
Plan a Solo Adventure
Take advantage of being single by planning a solo adventure or getaway. Whether it's a weekend retreat, a day trip to a nearby city, or a nature escape, exploring new places on your own terms can be liberating and empowering. You’re your best investment and
Remember, being single on Valentine's Day doesn't diminish your worth or happiness. With a bit of a mindset shift, you may find it's an opportunity to prioritize yourself, celebrate your individuality, and cultivate a deep sense of self-love.
By following these tips, you can turn Valentine's Day into a day of personal growth, gratitude, and joy, making it a celebration of the most important relationship you'll ever have—the one with yourself!
